After being home now for a while, I have begun to really settle back into my favorite place in the world.
I know that time is a factor in most things, and this would be a big one. Since I have been back people have been asking me about my next adventure, and I try to be as quiet as possible. See I love knowing what God has for me next but waiting to share it. Then if I wake up tomorrow and God tells me to go somewhere else, then I don't have to explain to the whole world that its changed. I think it has slowly become one of my favorite things, to just keep a secret with God.
I love knowing God has a purpose and a plan for my life, and knowing that He knows just how to tell me about it.
He doesn't have to send me a sign, or sound off a trumpet. Its like I hear His voice so simply, that its easy to know. He speaks to me in a strong, yet gentle tone, and as if I were to already know what was next. I never feel surprised, though I sometimes do feel unprepared.
That is when its important for me to remember that its just my job to show up. From there on God will direct me where to go. Sometimes stepping out can be a hard part, because of the fact that you might not 100% know what is ahead of you. You go knowing its God, but maybe not knowing if its at all possible in your own strength.
Most of the things I have come to do, have been things I thought I wouldn't ever do. Things I never desired to do. Things I knew that I would rather maybe not be doing. Though there was Gods voice inside of me telling me that maybe I was wrong about how I felt, and maybe I would love what He had in mind. I don't believe God would EVER direct me into a place where I would be in danger, or it wouldn't end up being my hearts desire. I think God is creative, and knows my heart better then I do. He always leads me to triumph through christ.
When I was younger I told my mother I was going to live with her my whole life, and never leave home. I thought I wouldn't get married, and I would just go to college, and work and be happy. I use to walk in fear, more then faith. I use to walk in my flesh, more then my spirit. I use to trust myself, more then I trusted God. I never got very far, but I didn't mind. Knowing going far could be risking.
Though once I began to turn around and face God, and see how truly beautiful and trustworthy He was, and how He loved me more then I loved myself...ha. It made my life become something I couldn't have made up in my own mind. It became no longer about me, but about Him and His purpose to love and serve people. I began to realize over time that I loved more then anything to help people, that almost didn't know they needed it.
As I have stepped in front of myself, and begun to walk out Gods destiny for my life, it seems a bit ridiculous, and sometimes hard to put into words. I know in my heart of hearts each place God sends me is a place I am suppose to be. I don't know at this moment what it will become, but I just trust that I don't have to have a title to be working for the kingdom. I just have to have a boss, and I do and He is paying me to go, and blessing me while I do.
Side note: Today the Forgostons, from India, were at church. It was such a blessing, and a good memory to see them each face to face. We went to lunch, and I got to hear stories, and just enjoy their company. I praise God for all the incredible people He has put in my life, that make each day better then the last. I am so blessed.
