The Real Deal

So lately,
I have been loving that Wellingtons sunshine rays have come out to greet me on my morning walks to work. The wind has been a bit absent, except yesterday and today it was blowing crazy.

As you know, in my recent posts I have been talking about "fame". Never really think much more about it, other then my desire to sit down for a cup of tea with Meryl Streep and ask her how she's done it. I always imagine having a one on one chat with someone who has made it "big". Then ask them all the questions that you ask normal people, and expect extraordinary responses. I could image me wide eyed, and unable to break from their words. Seeing as I have never had a conversation with a "fame maker" before ( other then Stacie Orrico when I was 10...and at the time I didn't have any great questions to ask) I really have no idea what it would be like.

Then the other day I realized. It would be like having a normal conversation with anyone else you didn't know. Except they would probably have more stories about themselves, then anyone else. Not a problem, then again not very interesting. Actors are just like anyone else here. They are working, and earning money. Its a career. People fall in love with the characters, therefore getting there love for a character mixed up with the real life person.

anyways. The other day, I was having a chat with my sister. About everything she has done, and is wanting to accomplish. She has so many amazing opportunities ahead of her. Though with a humble attitude, and professional outlook she makes it seem like anything is truly possible. As she was sharing, I found myself completely inspired by her, and wanting to listen to every word. Listening to someone I knew so well, but then again hearing brand new things about them, is so exciting. As I sat there, I began to think of things I wanted to pursue, and accomplish as well. Thinking, if she has come so far, then I can as well ( with Gods 100% help).

Afterward I realized, I felt as if I had a conversation with someone well known. Someone who knew what they loved, and were following after it. I wanted to remember all the things that were talked about. Then it hit me... I don't ever have to sit down with a stranger, who is famous to seem inspired, or important. I can sit with someone I care about, and love and feel as if the whole world is watch us and being completely astonished by what they hear.

I am learning that a camera can not make someone famous. Its in the eye of the beholder. Its who I choose to see as *famous* that actually makes them that way.

Red Carpet.

Today as I walked home from work, the street to our little cottage ( shimmy shack attack) was blocked off. Down our street there is a main theater, where they show films. Well today was the New Zealand Premiere of Lovely Bones. So Wellington had rolled out the red carpet all the way down the road. Fans slowly were gathering along the pathway. It was covered with security and paparatizi. Though I could count myself as one, I secretly pulled out my camera and tried to steal a few good shots of the beautiful and famous. Though I am short and not good at standing tippy toed for long... I got a couple pictures. It was my first time every seeing a red carpet, and movie stars. It was funny. I thought maybe I would get nervous, but I saw them, and rather I just thought " they are just like me." Although they were dressed head to toe in perfection. Perfect hair, and the dresses you can only dream about...they still were people. I loved seeing that side of reality. I am not quite sure how great Lovely Bones the movie is, but the actors and actress seemed super fantastic. It was great day, one for the books.

This little Light of mine.

This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine...This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine...
This is little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine...let it shine. let it shine, let it shine.

So today.
I was talking with my mom about how life ( the world) can sneak up out of no where and try to take you out. I have felt for the past few days a bit out of breath, and out of creativity. I find myself after watching films, or reading novels that I am sad they are not real. The thing is, deep down, I would love to be an actress. The idea of becoming some else for a short while is enchanting. Imaging in my mind, a life that is completely different then my own. So I pretended that watching celebs on The Ellen show, and joining twitter would bring me closer to "fame". A silly thing to try to accomplish, in the midst of living at the bottom of the world. It was more a pull towards the idea of people knowing me. Which after a chat with my mom, she pulled me out of my rut and back into reality.

See the world has these crazy things they find that are important. Then I believe it. It truly is so strange. Then again I did read today in the bible about this very thing. " For all that is in the world-the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life-is not of the Father, but of the world." -1 john 2:16 So pretty much that is: looking at yourself, comparing yourselves to others, then being prideful about it.There isn't anything wrong with fame, but it's what happens after the fame. Or before. If I try to strive to have all these things that I think would make me happy. or make me "feel" good, they wouldn't last long. I would love to act, but I want to know in my heart of hearts that it wouldn't ever be for the world, or fame. It would be because I knew that is what I was suppose to do. Gods plan.

My mom and I started talking about, some of the characters from the bible who became famous, not on purpose, but because their hearts were in the right place. David: killing a giant one day, taking care of sheep the next, the king noticed him after killing a giant, then David became king him self. Esther: an orphan, randomly chosen to be queen out of all the women in the land. She was just hanging out, doing what she thought she was suppose to be doing.

I guess I took a closer look at what fame should really look like. It should be a picture of a miracle, something that could not have ever happened without God's help. I want to fall into what God has planned for my life, not because I was forcing and fighting by myself to get there, but because God was placing me there as I continued steadly in what He wanted me to do first.

I kinda would get a bit down after watching all these actors and actress's talking and looking beautiful. Then I found this interview with Miley Cyrus. I have never been a "die hard" fan. Though what I do like about her, is how she doesn't try to be anyone but herself. A lady asked her " So what do you think of Twilight?", and without hesitation she said, " I don't believe in it, I don't like the idea of people falling in love with characters." I don't know if those were her exact words. But what I loved was hearing someone who was really well known, not being afraid to be different in their thinking. Its inspiring in a way, to see a little light among so much gray. Thanks Miley.

So Long post...short. I am learning that being who God created me to be, is more important then having the whole world know me by name. Instead the One who made the whole world, knows me by name. I am excited though to see where He takes me...so far, so good.

New Zealand Update.

Considering I have not blogged in a while. I thought an update was appropriate.

I am working away here in New Zealand, and beginning to really enjoy it. It may be highly influenced by my first two paychecks I got last week. Though I think it also has something to do with me starting to get to know some friendly faces around this place. Jessica, Ben and I have been highly busy.. being not busy at home. I love the thought after the clock rolls rounds to 4:53pm, that in 15 Min's I will be in the front door, with my Pj's on and laying across the couch. I must admit that about a week ago, as a surprise, Ben rented Twilight for Jess and I to watch with him. He actually rented it as a joke, because we had been making fun of Twilight. Though half way through, we both were aw struck and shhing Ben while vampires captured our imaginations. The next day, Jessica walked in the front door and said " read my mind?", and then I thought for a bit and responded, " you want to watch twilight again?!", "YES, that's crazy you knew!" she said. I found it not that hard to guess, considering the excitement in her face. By Saturday we had made plans to see the second one "New Moon Saga" on the big screen. After we stared at shirtless werewolf's, and lovestruck vampires for 2 hours the film ended, and we were left hanging on the last words. We then deiced to purchase the next novel, knowing the next movie won't be out tell the summer. So as of currently Jessica, and I have been sucked into, what I call the " Twilight Black Hole". I read the 3rd book in 3 days, and I don't actually read books. Its been on the top of my "talk about" list. When I meet someone, " Hey! have you seen twilight?". Lame sauce I know, but really reading a book is the closer version of the real film.

Other then falling in love with fictional characters, I have been filing away and answer phones. Currently my other job has picked up a bit, and I have been doing all sorts of things. I am beginning to think they trust me on the computers. Where as when I first arrived they asked me to alphabetize a stack of papers. There a few people worth mentioning in this blog from my work. Alex. He not only holds my little brothers first name, but the ability to make fun of every American word that comes out of my mouth. He trys to repeat it wondering if he sounds American. FAIL. I do find it quite entertaining. I asked him if they wear clogs here, he then repeated " Clogs?!" in his fake American accent. nice. Also Jay, who is leaving I think this week for the UNITED KINGDOM. I warned him the weather would be miserable ( no offense UK). Jay is not a big fan of Christmas music...sorta like the Grinch of the office. Though Alex on the other hand is our own personal office Santa Claus. I forget that Christmas is coming, until he turns on the Christmas radio station. Its shocking how but I forget that its Christmas here. Jay mumbles something about how much he hates the music, and Alex goes searching for Opera Christmas music. The mumbling gets louder, then so does the music. Hilarious. I end up humming along, hoping Alex doesn't turn it off considering Jays disapproval. Good old office combat.

ah what else. Oh yes. I bought a guitar tuner the other day, which I was so pleased about.
and I am almost done working here at Jessica's Office... countdown: 3 hours!

( this whole blog sounds like how twilight was written....I wrote it like a chapter to a novel...dissapointing...the book is effecting my creative blogging abilities...)

21 Across the World

Yesterday, well sorta today was (is) my 21st birthday. not only that but its November 21st...so my Golden Birthday. 21 on the 21st!

I loved all the things people did for me all over. So I thought I would share them with you.

Jessica and I spent the day together... She took me to an Indian food restaurant for dinner! Which was full of a huge Indian family enjoying the food as well. We sat and I taught jess how to eat with her hands. She was an instant learning. Its the flick at the end that makes the difference. What was hilarious is 1. we ate with our hands, thinking " they are gonna think we are AWESOME!" then the got their food and were using their silverware. So that was a bit embarrassing. 2. because we ate with our hands a day after and we still smell like curry.
After dinner Jessica took me to see Julie and Julia. That thing is this was an AMAZING movie theater. It is about 2o minutes from home. You reverse your tickets online, then you get there and buy them. A man is in charge on letting people into the theater. He guides you in with a flash light, and directs you to your sit. Which is not just a sit...but a nice couch with pillows. The whole theater is full of couchs. Its like a giant living room you share with strangers. I loved it! You can order wine, or ice cream, anything and eat it while you are watching the film. I loved just hanging out with my sister, had such a fun day.

I forgot to mention. I haven't got to talk with Judith and David from India since i left. I have been missing them and Hannah so much. But we were all busy. BUT yesterday we skyped! I got to see all of them. They all sang me happy birthday. It was my favorite present : )

Then this morning I woke up, and went to try a new church here in wellington. Was pretty good, met some really nice people. Then I came up, and I walked into the house to see my dad had ordered me 21 yellow roses!!!!!!! They are beautiful , thanks dad!!!

Then I went unto my computer and my friends from Ireland had a birthday party for me in Belfast, and sent me the video!!!! They all ate cake, and lite candles and sang. I loved it so much.

I just really have had such an amazing birthday(s) and wanted to say thank you to all of you!!! For the calls and message, and thought gestures! Love you!

Working Alone.

So today while Jessica and her office are having their Christmas party, I am manning the reception desk. That means answering phones " Good Morning, thank you for calling this is Laura". Also side jobs, like contractors will come up, and people will randomly come in with questions. I usually don't have the right answers. One of my first calls was a man asking for i thought " Brian", and continued to tell him that "he" was out of the office. The man on the other line was quiet then replied, "umm you mean "she"". Come to find out New Zealand accents are actually like a foreign language. He was actually saying Branka, which is a strange name by itself.
I felt a bit awkward, and he fold it quite hilarious. So not only was I doing these activities, but also was solo in the office. Which in my case involved fast bathroom breaks. Seeing as I am the only person here to answer phones, I was dashing to the toilet and back. Its sorta like a mid day workout.

After sitting properly for a good 5 hours, I thought about putting my feet up and just relaxing ( which I did ). In the back of my mind i was wondering if they have one of those office video cameras. Then once a month the managers get together and watch, and laugh their heads off. I tried not to pull any wedgies or pick my nose. I couldn't spot a camera, but it doesn't mean its not there...dum dum dum.

Oh also, because I can't leave the desk area Mr. Ben, Jessica's fantastic boyfriend brought me my favorite bagel! It was a fantastic lunch, and I must do a shout out. Thanks Ben! Also the other evening Ben and I watch transformers... the new movie. A bit overdone, but still loved it.

so back to the back stories. I am almost done with my fully day, and am taking time now in the end to write a blog. ALERT: Bicycle Boy, Mail Man Pickup, and Crazy Lady phone Call

So as I was relaxing and reading when the elevator door opened. It was like a easy going visitor. This was a full of mail delivery in high speed. A guy came out, with his bicycle helmet, and sun glasses still on. Hair was a bit wind blown ( not unusual for wellington, but important for dramatic effect in the story). He came right at me with a a parcel, and mumbled something and ran back over to the elevator. I then was just holding it and watching, and then turned back around and said " I asked you for your name!". I quickly said " LAURA!" ah. He was in a rush. It was hilarious. kinda felt like i was on punked, and handled it all very well.

Afterwards another person came back up the elevator and was asking to pick up any mail. I continue to tell them the whole office would not be returning tell after 5 and would most likely be intoxicated. We then became instant friends. I never got his name, but I feel like that doesn't really matter. He asked me if i was going to meet up with them, and going pub hopping. I told him, I don't like to pub hob. You should have seen his face, my first encounter telling a wellingder that I don't drink. Shockly he took it well, and said he likes to pub hop. I told him he isn't alone here in wellington. He was trying to decide if he could leave work early cause we are his last stop for mail, and everyone doesn't come back to 5. I didn't get him my thoughts, cause i said if something happened and he got in trouble, I don't want him to blame the receptionist. He left shortly after.

Last but NOT least. The phone just rang and I picked it up. The lady at the other end said, " Gooooooood aftttterrrrrrrrnoon! is Ryannnnnnnnnn there?" I found it quite hilarious her dragging her words, and wish i could describe it better. Though i can't just image a funny lady calling and purposely talking long. its great.

Rowmens

I have just started doing a little bit of a study in the book of Romans.
I am reading a book, then going and reading Romans, to see if what the writer is saying is lining up to what the bible says.

As I was reading I was loving how Paul ( who wrote the book of Romans) was saying that God sees everyone, Jews and unbelievers all the same. In Chapter 2, it was describing how religious people have been mis-judging people and thinking of themselves higher then the average Joe. Paul begins to explain how the law in the old testament didn't come so we could judge ourselves against other people, it was for us to notice how none of us could meet the mark. That we needed a Savior. If we were to judge ourselves against the law, we couldn't match up.

The thing I find so interesting, is that I know that. Though I seem to find myself not up to par. That I am missing it, and that sometimes I am harder on myself...when God isn't concerned in the least. I think "oh I haven't done this right, or i forgot to do that". When God is still up there loving me. not because of ANYTHING I can do, but because of EVERYTHING He has already done for me.

Sometimes maybe we all like to feel like we have to check boxes off our list, and slowly climb the success latter. So we choose for ourselves to try to met the mark, and we do good for a while, then just like average, we make a mistake. Then we are hard on ourselves, thinking God is disappointed with us. its ridiculous! ha

I love these verses in Chapter 3. " Therefore by the deeds of the law no flesh will be justified in His sight, for by the law is the knowledge of sin." -Romans 3: 20

so I read that and realized... So instead of it saying " for the law is the knowledge of sin." it could say " for the grace of God is the knowledge of justification." Justification means: just as if you had NEVER sinned.

Q;so how are we justified you ask????

" Being justified freely by His grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus." -Romans 3:24

A:by Jesus. thank goodness

"Therefore we conclude that a man is justified by faith apart from the deeds of the law."

After I read these, i had a light bulb go off. Its like you can hear something over and over, and never really understand it, tell you learn it for yourself. I can not be justified by myself, the only way I can is by believing on Jesus.

Jesus came took everything on himself, and left nothing but perfect salvation for us!

So a bit of a more serious blog...but I just was so excited about how easy it is to believe God, and what He did...and BAM your in the justification club! HOORAY

Breaking the rules on working.

Today was my official first day back to work, in almost 2 years.
While I am in New Zealand, I had to get a job to pay for rent. Jessica was kind enough to help me get a couple part time jobs here in Wellington.

So I woke up this morning, feel I'd say more nervous then normal. I decied to keep it relaxed, and get ready slowly. bad idea. I ended up getting sucked into facebook, and a wee chat with my old time friend Gabrielle. While not only was I running out of time, I was still facebook chatting, and my labtop was dieing. So I had to bring my lab-top and charger along with me to each room in the house. I was cooking breakfast while typing, and then eating the lounge while typing, then getting dressed while typing. It was a full on experience.

As I was typing and trying to get dressed, it was one of those moment when you realize maybe none of you clothes actually look good for what you need to do. I keep changing pants and shoes. eventually i typed to Gabrielle that i had no clue what to where. Her advice " You look beautiful, just be confident in what your wearing!". So I thought " YES I CAN DO THIS...!" I continued to try and tell myself it, and realized I couldn't actually say it tell I put on a danglely necklace. I now know, when all else fails put on a danglely necklace and be confident about your outfit! I was wearing plaid, so I choose to sport the pony tail. A pony tail always works with plaid.

So I finish my last few words with my friend, ( forget to sign off facebook) then go running out the door. I brought an apple with me cause i didn't know what sort of things I would be doing at work, but I knew i would want food. I walked half way there, and rode the cable car up the hill, and headed into work.

I am currently leaving my job secretive for the fact that I don't know who reads this. but if you know me, you know where I am working. ha. hope that doesn't ruin the story.
But I walk into the office and knock on my managers door, and soon come to find out she is out of the office, and "alex" the guy who is suppose to be giving me a tour, is out sick. So I get thrown into work mood and stay training right away. I loved it. I first had to alphabetize, which I didn't tell them I am not one to be quick with my A,B,C's. I seriously had to count through the A,B,C'w while doing it. Then I had to do filing, and numbering and saving documents on a computer. The people I have met so far are amazing. The the people in the office are outgoing, and really easy to chat with.

There are what they call "Filing Farie's" that is what I am, and then they have " Filing Warriors" which are guy versions. The only warrior I met today was named, umm actually I can't remember. He was ridiculously good at his job. He knew everything, and I didn't hesitate to ask him lots of questions. So really our jobs are to assist the other people in the office with work they can't be bothered with. I like those sort of jobs. Makes me feel like I am the back round. The back round is always what makes the whole room look complete. It there wasn't good paint on the walls they would be just plain white. So us keeping the office up to parr, makes them look good as well.

I got off early, and walked unto the cable car to go back down. On the way I met a friendly lady named Yevette. She is from Malaysia. She began to talk about Navagators, and people that were missionaries. I got to excited, and I asked her more about it. I ended up getting some peoples information on christian organizations here in Wellington. That was so encouraging. She said afterward, that she was going to walk down the hill today, but deiced to take the cable car instead. I told her God wanted her to talk with me...: )

I then walked from my work, to Jessica and chatted about our days. Then trotted on home, and relaxed. I love work day # 1.

I forgot on the way to work I found $4 on the ground!!! So God, and so good!

Spontenous Weather Patterns.

I woke up this morning, not wanting to look out the window in case the Grey clouds had deiced to stay another day in wellington. Against my will, I had to rise to my feet and use the "toilet" as they would say here. Surprisingly as I opened my door, I could see the sun shining through every window! I grabbed my bible and another book, and sat in the sun shine as long as i could.

I had an appointment again with "Jess" today to get my bank account and other such things sorted out. I tried out a crazy colorful outfit, just to see how I would fit in. Here in Wellington people wear the strangest outfits, and everyone says no one cares. I did notice a few awkward stares...but for the most part I think my outfit did alright. I will continue trying to see how crazy it can get before people start to notice.

As I walked to Jessica's work, I noticed the whole work force had dropped everything and went to lay in the sun. I was wondering who were the un "lucky" ones who had to cover for the sun bathers? Everyone here also seems to jog/run all the time. I feel like I am more fit just by watching them all run past me. I almost feel like I don't really need to workout, since all of them are doing so well at it already.

After much hard work, and photo coping "Jess" and I finished everything up. The banker was quite the funny guy. I enjoyed his stories about Harry potter and the current books he is reading. I love people that aren't afraid to be friends with you, even when they hardly know your name.

Jessica had to finish up at work, so I headed back. Although i did mention the beautiful sunny weather earlier, it didn't last long. Clouds rolled in, and bringing along windy. I was walking past a group of workers and my skirt flew up in the air, and all the road work flew into my eyes. It was a great memory...not. As I made my way home i spotted my type of "runner". I had looked behind me and spotted a guy about my age, who just seemed to be walking slowly far behind me. I looked back forward, and continued walking. 3 minutes later, he comes running past. I kept my eye on him thinking he was a Laura runner. As soon as he got pretty much almost out of site...he stopped running. See That is how i run. I walk until I see people, then i jog way pass them tell I can hardly breathe then i spot and walk again...knowing that those people definitely thought i was fit. ha I just want to say " Keep up the good work running man.!"

The Shimmy Shack

how do you spell shimmy? I think that's right.
Its something I still have not mastered the art of. I think to my advantage.
Shimmying could bring about more problems then solutions in my life.

Awk. So Wellintong post #1. For those of you that are wondering what my current location is:
Wellington, New Zealand. My port is: The Shimmy Shack rented by the lovely couple Ben and Jess. Its a new thing for me to call Jess...Jess. Its like her New Zealand name.
She moved here and now everyone calls her Jess. For the insiders mind, back in the CO we all call Jess...Jessica, or Jessie, or Jessie girl. I am starting to love it though. I had to fill out some forms today for getting a jay of bee ( job ). There you could write the name you would like to be called by, i seriously thought hard about if i wanted ta fake identity. I decided that for sanity reasons, to stick with my everyday, born with, name.

While I am living here with "Jess", I will be renting and cleaning the shimmy. I also picked up a couple part time jobs, so then people here can have something to talk about when they run into me. Which for the most part you see everyone and their cats roaming the streets of the windy city. Sadly less cats then people. For those of you that can't wait to hear about the sheep... I haven't spotted any yet...except a few pairs of sheep skin boats and rugs? pretty darn close.

So I have been here for a complete week as of TODAY. My aunt was out visiting my sister as well, so I have just now moved into my room officially. Its exciting, a new environment and a new room. It keeps me creative. So after moving my things into my room, I met up with "Jess" and she took me to my first new job, to pick up my papers and get a feel for what I'll be doing. I must first explain that my sister "Jess" is sorta like those 1950's film stars. Her look fits perfect into the corporate work world, which my look is more of a " did she shower today " look. Which I am quite proud of. As we walked side by side to the cable car, her in her cute work dress and clicking heels, and my grey printed T-Shirt that happens to say in BOLD letters " keepin it clean like a washin machine!" We arrive at the cable car, which is sorta like a little train that takes you up a hill, and the guy asked how old i was. We had him guess, he said "15". In between our laughter we said " no, almost 21". He was saying that if I was 15 I could have got a discounted price on the cable car. Nice guy.

After I experienced my new job atmosphere, I headed back to "Jess"'s office for a wee hangout. Then back home, to relax and do my normal everyday life. couch time with my mac. I only have a few more days of what I call normalcy, until I hit real life in the face. To work on Monday. yeah I said work...and I said Monday. dangerous combo.

Birthday Blog #2 DAD!

My Dad's birthday was yesterday...and I am writing his birthday blog today.

The more I have traveled the more I remember memories with my dad. I don't quite know why, but it must be a way of keeping me from missing him. I remember all the toys he use to keep for our bath times, which included military boats and helicopters. I had no idea there were other sorts of toys. My dad always tried to included military lifestyle into our family blood line. When I was younger I never really understood the "big deal" with the grunting, and the American flag. Now that I am getting a bit more informed, I have begun to realize what an awesome thing my dad can say he served in. Proud of you dad.

Other then the memories, my dad brings so much joy into my life. He is the one person I know I can call and will answer his phone at any time, unless for two reasons: 1. He can't hear it 2. He left his phone in the other room, and was watching NCSI. I love that he always finds time to have time with me. I love that when i need to talk, he is ready to listen. He is one of the best listeners i have ever met in my life. I love that after i have talked off his ear he always says, " Now, would you like my advice...you can take it or leave it." Its the way he puts it, that actually makes you want to ask for his advice. Its not like he needs to say anything, but wants to know if we want he to. I love that.

My dads favorite restaurant is Village Inn. Its not just like a frequent stop, it is my dads second home. He knows the cooks, and waiters by name, and they know him. He loves when we come home, or bring friends to introduce them to the staff. " Hi, This is my daughter Laura, and her best friend from Florida named Martha!". Ha I seriously can't help but laugh out loud thinking about it. I love that he just has his own little grove in the world. It makes me happy, that he is happy.

My dad does a few different things, but my favorite thing he does is bus driving. I think he started driving kids to school about a year ago. He gets up before the sun, loads the kids in the bus and drives them to and from school every day. His stories make me laugh so hard. My dad has a way with little kids, that is hard to explain. He can't help but try to be a dad to all of them. He tells me stories of how cute the kids are, and the stories they tell him. Of course there are the kids that cause trouble, and he has to have them clean the bus, or sit up front. It is just adorable.

I think that my dad can be his toughest crowd. Sometimes he doesn't realize all that he has done, and all that he has become. I have seen my dad change since i was 6 into an awesome man of God. He has accomplished so much, and been the best dad to me. He reminds me of the dad from full house.That sits down and just has the nicest things to say at the right moment.

The world sometimes tells us what we all need to become. What we all need to do, and what we all should look like. By this age, you need to have this and that. I would have to disagree with the world with almost everything it says. It comes up with status, and levels that are truly not from the heart. You realize that each of us, have a story and a destiny different from each other. They aren't suppose to look the same, or be the same. We were not born to mirror each other, but to show each other our own colors. Sometimes i think my dad doesn't realize that even though, his life my look different from the average, it just means that its his own. I love what he has done, and is doing with his life. Regardless of what the world holds against him to compare. My dad should own a plaque for being the best dad.

So Dad thanks for being you, and letting me always be me. Because of that, it makes it easier for my light to shine. You taught me to be all that I can be, and I believed you. Thanks for showing me a picture of my first dad...God.

: ) Love you and Happy Birthday!

Buzzzz

This is a quote from " The Bee Movie"
I found quite inspiring : )

"According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way that a bee should be able to fly.

Its wings are too small, to get its fat little body off the ground.

The bee of course, flies anyways.

because bees don't care, what humans think is impossible. "

We need to be a bit more like bees, and little less like humans.

changing is a choice

A song can't change someones life.

I have come to the conclusion that I have wanted my music to change peoples days, or moods. To make them change their minds sets, and situations. Though a song only last for three or four minutes. Once you press play, and listen in those few moments you can loose track of worry, or gain joy, or even cry. But just as the song draws to a close, your real life flashes back into place, where your imagination was drawing pictures from ideas inside of a song.

The choice to change must be chosen by the person themselves, not the writer of the songs. No matter how many songs they hear, or new ideas sung about they won't change, unless they want to. Change comes by choice, and choice comes by the freedom to choose yourself, and you can try to influence someones freedom, but you don't have the power to choose for them.

I do find myself in almost another world when a good song comes on the radio, as I am driving along. I picture myself in just that place as they sing about. Then another song comes on and i completely forget what I was singing about before. example: " I'll spread my wings, and I'll learn how to fly, though its not easy to tell you goodbye, but I gotta take a chance, make a change, and break away..." -Kelly Clarkson. I always sing that song as if I am leaving someone to do something. But when the song ends I go back to my normal activities. Nothing is wrong with this at all. I actually find it quite healthy. I think it is good to have things in life inspire us to pursue great things. Though if we were to change our lives to fit a song, we'd be changing every four minutes.

As a song writer, I find this concept deeply sading. I write songs to change lives, but deep down I know that I can't ever change a life but one song. Though I know Jesus can change a live in less then it takes for me to sing through one of my songs. He can use me to change a live, or my music. I can not expect that when I play a song the person is going to turn around, and be changed. Feeling 100% better, and ready to face whatever is ahead of them. I think, yes it can be encouraging...but it takes a big amount of work on their part as well. Most of the time someones words can't change your reality. So I believe my songs, can encourage people..to change. And for a moment, it can encourage them...and build them up. Though my music can't change people.

See today...I played a new song I wrote to someone I thought needed to hear it. It is about doing something in life that you know is too big for you to do on your own, and how that means God has a big part in helping you. So I played it for them, and they seemed to enjoy it, but I left the room, and was sitting and just thinking ( my usual activity)...and overheard them once more talking about the challenge they were going through, and what was difficult about it. It was then I realized that even though I play a song, it can't change someone. It was encouraging, but it didn't change their circumstance.

In life, i think we all find things we think will fix or change our situations. In the end they all seem to run short, or run out. Our attempts are well thought out, and as we think a "great" idea. The true fact is that everything was made to come short... the only thing that truly fixes anything...is Jesus. Knowing that its not my job to fix the world, or change people is encouraging. Then again I think about how Jesus has to use people to reach people, so I believe we can influence change. But love never forces. So I can't force anyone to change with my music. I just have to write believeing God will use my music to influence change, and encourage people.

thats all.

THE BIG BLOG

My last day in India: ( and the evening before )

I slept in a super blessed room, when the power would go out, my room would still have power and AC. So earlier in the evening the power had gone out, so I told the rest of the people in the house, " If you need AC feel free to sleep in my room." No one took me up on my offer, so I was tucked in bed, preparing for the next day ahead where i would be leaving, and going onward to Colorado. When I heard a knock on my door...Autumn and Jeff a couple I lived with opened my door, and all I could see through the darkness was there head flashlights. Then autumn says,
" we decided we wanted to have a sleep over with you on your last night." Following behind her Jeff brought in a mattress and two pillows. We all got snug, and fell right asleep.

That morning, I woke up a little earlier then usual. Considering it was my last day in India, we had suseela the lady that helps with the house, come and put Sarees on Judith and me. After getting all ready, we piled into the car and headed to the school for my last day with the students.

As we walked in the door, all the students were laughing, and just in shock that Judith and I had sarees on. They all said he both looked so Indian. I felt a bit shy, considering I was dressed up head to toe, and trying to act normal. After a couple of the students classes that day, we had a long break until their next class. A few students gathered in a classroom to play a few songs they had written. Of course they began to play, and the other students drizzled in to sing and dance along. Don a student sat playing the guitar, while the others were clapping and singing with him.
When the music ended, they all said to go get some tea. They all know that I love Indian tea.

So as we shuffled into the other outside room, I saw the students had prepared a fair well party for me! They had tea and snacks. We all stood around eating and laughing, and just enjoying each others company. I thought that was the end of it, cause we all went outside for a group photo, then back inside ( i thought) for class. As we walked back into the school I told the students " Thank you for doing that, it meant so much." That ended up NOT being the end, but the begining to a huge fair well ceremony for me. In India they are quick to throw parties for any occasion.

They had me sit down, as a couple students gave speeches about me being in India. A friend Elizabeth who is a student, did a dance to some music. Another student sang a song, and did an interruption of me ( which was SPOT ON). One person stood and shared something he felt God wanted me to know. That I was a bottle filled half way with water, but I floating in a sea of water. He said God wanted to me know that any tears that I have cried or things that have happened to me, that i still carry in that glass bottle, have be overtaken by his love for me. His love is the sea of water that is keeping me a float. Then they had to stand up, and they gave me a card and gifts. A pair of shoes, jewery, and a picture frame. Also they asked me to give a speech...so I did. Laughingly, it was like a movie moment. I felt like you only see these things happen on TV and don't think they will ever happen to you. It was so hilarious. Then a hand full of students stood around, hold candles and Jeff grabbed the guitar. They all lite their candles and began to sing
" Go Light your world ". At the end they handed me a candle and said, " Carry your light around the world." and then told me that i could then blow mine out here. Victor a student then disappeared, and showed back up holding a cake! The cake said Fair well Laura, we will miss you. And as i shared before they handed me the knife, and wouldn't begin to clap until I cut the cake. So i pretended I was going to cut it, then i would pull away...then finally started cutting. I grabbed the first piece, and feed the people around me. Then they each cut their own piece, and feed me back. A few students wiped frosting on my face ( a tradtions for babies) but they did it to me as a joke. We all had to head back to the house so i could pack and get ready. So I said my goodbyes, and found it quite sad to leave everyone.

I couldn't believe what a big party they threw. I told them all that would never happen in America. They all laughed, and I don't know if they understood...that what they did for me was amazing...and I will never forget it.

Today I sailed on...

I am in Sing-a-pore...
and missing Chennai.

Yesterday, at school the students threw me a surprise party...that left me speechless. I will blog soon...every detail I can remember. It was amazing. Then the couple I stayed with and a few friends all went to eat at an Italian restraunt...in India. I then said my goodbyes, and departed Chennai.

This is a bit lame...but wanted to just post the last photo on me in Chennai, and let you know a BIG blog is about to happen.

: )

So Happy here.

So, it is was last evening at home in chennai. I have begun to feel that sad stomach feeling. This time tomorrow night, I will be almost boarding a plane, and headed away from such an amazing place. I have loved the last 2 months, more then i could blog about. I have met the most amazing people that I have ever met, here in Chennai. I will miss it so much, and i honestly hope i come back soon.

Tomorrow morning i will wake up, and get dressed in a sari along with the couple I am staying with...and head to school. My last morning with the students. After spending the morning with them, and having a cup of tea...I will say my goodbyes. Then head home to finish packing and getting life altogether to leave.

Today though!
BIG DAY. I went to school, and after went to Eden my FAVORITE indian food place here. Ate too much, and loved every bite. Then came home, helped a bit with the baby, and then everyone gathered in the kitchen for game night. We placed The farming game, for 5 hours! It was amazing. Then after, a friend came over. BUT not just any friend.

When I was in Northern Ireland, I met a family there and spent time with them. I went to school with this family's mother, and graduated with her. Then I came here to Chennai. While I have been here this families daughter has been here in India as well. I only found out this morning that she was living 10 mins form me in CHENNAI. So we called each other, and by the evening she was at my home and enjoying getting to know everyone. She said it was such a God moment, she has just been praying for christian friends here in India. Also she has been hoping to go to bible school, and only found out recently about CBC India, and had no idea i was working with the directors. So she is now thinking about doing part time course.

It was an amazing evening. I really can express how happy I feel. I love helping people more then anything...and finishing my time in India...bringing people together to help each other...made it all try together in a bow. Love Love Love it.

24 hours left...

Ultimate Indian Experience.

A few days ago I was invited to come to a students home for a meal and company. So I arranged to come today, for the afternoon.
I arrived VIA motorbike. It was the best 30 minute drive. Our normal driver Prabu usually drives the car, but I asked if I could ride on the bike instead. I will admit I was a little bit nervous to first: get on a bike with no helmet and no clue what it is like. and second: going to someones house that I have never been to, wondering what I am in for.

Prabu was the best motorbike driver...he went the perfect speed, and I took videos and photos the whole way. There was smoke, fuels, and dust all over. I loved every bit about it. I just hid behind prabu when it got too dusty. I wish i could describe how it was, but its one of those experiences you have to do to understand. It was like being on one of the tours when, when your in a tram and everything passes by so quickly you can barely remember what you saw. Though when its over, you just remember it was so much fun to see so many things. I wish I had driven more on the bike...

So he dropped me off, and they picked me up about 5mins from their home. And drove me in their van, with a fan AC back to their home. There home was painted purple! The whole family lives together, its like the brandy bunch. The grandma, grandpa, their children, and their children's, children. The way of life in India is so different from ours. I spent most of the time just in my own mind trying to process everything that was being said. Indians proudly display their gifts and talents around their home. They cover their walls with artwork you would never imagine would work. Though they shower you with gifts, and snacks. I tried this spicy puff veggie thing...AMAZING. My mouth was on fire, but i pretended to be tough, and honestly loved the flavor. Its like you either choose to love it or hate it. In my case i choose to love it.


After much chatter, and hellos. They asked if I have been dressed in a Sari yet? I replied that I hadn't but would love to. Then then gathered all there sari, and let me choose. I was thinking maybe they wouldn't fit. But they placed the top part on, and the arms were to large, so they took it and re sowed it in 5 mins, and had it on me in 10. I was just in awe of how they get things done. They wrapped me up, and dressed me in fake gold. A red sari, trailed with gold. I felt like a princess. I wore it for the next hour, walking around and pretending i belonged there. They said I looked like the Indian Model Dolls in the shop cause i have white skin. The "manakins". They grabbed my camera and took photos the rest of the evening. : )

Then we all gathered in their prayer room, to sing and pray. I didn't know that was what was going on. Then I so was glad i brought my guitar tuner, because they asked me to play my songs and of course in India, they have a guitar but it usually isn't tuned. So I played a few songs, then once again each person took a turn and sang their songs as well. I tried to video as much as i could to never forget it. Two little kids came up to sing as well and pray. They asked me if i would pray. I told me sure, but it won't be very long. Here in India people pray for a very long time. They have lots to say. So I just did a quick one, and ended it with a powerful "AMEN".

Afterwards they brought out Indian tea...my favorite. I will miss that tea so much when i leave. I think it is so delicious. I decided to get back into my regular clothes, because prabu was coming soon to pick me up and drive me back home. So I changed and packed away the things they gave me carefully, and gave each person a hug goodbye. They all said they hoped to see me soon in Chennai again. Really was a blessing to experience an Indian Family, and culture for a day.

On the way home, it was dark out and I got to watch the city pass by all lit up and beautiful. People busy on the streets, cars honking, cows strolling around. We passed by a small lake, and I could see the reflection of the city in it...stunning. The wind was blowing my hair every direction, and i pretended once again that I was use to it. I kept looking around and asking prabu question after question about India and life here. I told him that after spending the day with the students family I realize really how different I am to India. I think that you have to be yourself wherever you go, even if you don't seem to fit in quite well, just stick out real well instead. Sometimes you want to fit where you are, but its alright to stand out a little. The world is really so big and small at the same time.


Prabu dropped me off, and my face covered with dirt i walked quickly into the house to make sure the birds didn't poop on me. Its a nightly thing. We all run into the house hoping we didn't get any on us. As i stood at the sink washing my hands, i looked over my shoulder and saw that my shirt had bird poop on it...BUMMER #1, then i turned my head and got bird poop in my hair BUMMER #2. I just had judith wipe it out, and continued on with my eventful evening.

Just now closing my evening with a little blog. I just also washed my feet and hands... its a nightly activity here. Or else you will go to bed with all the things you walked on during the day.

So all in all...an amazing experience. :)

Happy Birthday Alex!

My little brother is one of those people you don’t find everyday. A rare type of fantastic, that you can’t buy at your local grocery store. He surprises me so often with all the things he knows about. I remember so many times saying something out loud like ex: “ I have no idea what the capital of Mexico is…” and then he comes in and just out of nowhere says, “ Mexico City”. Then continues on with his daily activities. While he has moved onto the next room, I stand scratching my head still wondering how the heck he knows all these things. He has this secret passion for life, and people that you cannot make someone have. I truly feel like he loves people more then you actually should. So he keeps it hidden, so you have to dig to find it. I think he loves big, and then that opens a door for hurting big at times. People are people we should love, but never depend on them loving us back. Jesus is the one person that always loves us back BIG. Alex would be a good perfect picture of Jesus, if you saw how much he loved people all the time. He always seems to have money coming out of his ears. Once again one of those people that just naturally produce their own income with ease. Although he does seem to have a steady flow of moolaaaaa he works harder then any other 19 year old that I know. He got a job when he was I think 14, and had the highest sales. On the other hand I didn’t get a job tell I was 17, and I defiantly didn’t get highest sales.

I really love so much about my brother, and I think that sometimes he doesn’t see how great he truly is. How all the qualities God has given him are to not only blessing him but people around him. He is also one of the busiest people I have met, sorta like a businessman. Running a muck, and coming home for late TV and a bowl of cereal to top it off. I love seeing him when I do see him. He really brings out a part of me, that I usually try to keep hidden as well. I am very child ish, but I try to act mature and my age. But when me and alex do something together I turn into an 8 year old. I usually shout, and laugh and do ridiculous things. I think cause I just know that alex loves me for me, even if my actions embarrass him. : ) OH YES one other thing is his fashion. He is usually able to pull himself together in a short period of time while looking sharp. As for me I try to throw on a few things, and then ask him what needs to be fixed (its usually the shoes). I love that he keeps all the things that people give him, going back to how much he cares about people. He never wants to throw much away. I feel like, cause when he gives he gives from a true heart, believing that person will truly enjoy what he has given them. So when he receives something, that is what he does too. I really love the way my brother is, and I want him to never forget how much we all love him. My life wouldn’t be the same with out you little brother. You are great.

Happy 19th Birthday, wish I was there to blow out your candles before you do. Ha.

p.s. I am still providing the plastic forks and knifes for the party ;)

Sing me a song...

Here In India, I have realize something that happens every now and again...that you would never see happen in America.

You will be standing around with people, and then one person will say " I have written a song, and I will sing it for you." out of no where. Everyone then gets quiet, and they begin to sing. After the song is over we all clap and then continue to talk. The other day we had a gathering of full time and part time students. We also had it planned out who was going to do skits and music. The funny thing is, someone would just say " I want to perform a dance.." and then they would go up and perform on the spot. A girl asked me once to play guitar to a song i never knew...It was the strangest 3 mintues of my life...and I think of hers as well. I attempted to find the key she was singing in, then play it...but it didn't work that way.

Tonight, we have a friend Wilfer who came over to help the couple I am staying with. When he arrived he was waiting with me in the kitchen, and just said..." I am going to sing you a song I wrote", and then said " Oh are you making fun of my song introductions?" ( because I have played my songs for the students and that is how i introduce them.) He said, " NO...I want to sing you my own song i wrote 4 years ago." He then starts singing in the kitchen at 8 at night. It was an awesome song, about His bones and blood being alive by Jesus. I just found it so funny, us just standing alone in a kitchen while he sang. I stood watching, but was the only audience.


P.s. Tonight I said my goodbyes to the part time students, and got a chance to lead worship for them as well. It was sad to know I won't see them...until I see them. I hate the idea of never seeing them again, so I believe I will somehow see them.

I love India.

Charlotte's Web

So this evening I was pleasantly enjoying a skype chat with my mother, and her FANTASTIC new hair cut. when...dum dum dummmmm
I look down to find a spider. Like usual I pick up a good size novel and throw it on top of the spider then CRUSH it. I did, but to my surprise...baby spiders came out all over the place!
I just sat in shock watcingh them as they poured out, and the first word that came out oh my mouth
" Oh...Shi*" . I couldn't believe I said it, but then again I couldn't believe they're were baby spiders walking around my room. Its like whats worse then seeing a spider, killing a spider, whats worse then killing a spider, finding out that by killing it you produced a spider farm in your own room.

So for the pass 30 mins I have been walking around like an Indian staring at the walls and floor, trying to find invisible baby spiders. Also note I was holding window cleaner spray to get them wet, then smash them. Sidenote: these are jumping spiders...so imagine, invisible baby spiders that can jump. It was a terrible 30 mins soaked in prayer and sweat. I did kill most of the little guys, and moved my bed 3 times. I sound a bit paranoid...but i really think it was necessary. They seemed to get smaller and smaller the more i found them around the room...which made me wonder how many were too small to see. Of course i grabbed my bible to see afterward if i would turn to some verse about protection. I came to some random verse about David dieing in the old testament.

So with all the baby spiders out of sight, and OUT of my room... I sit on my new positioned bed, and wonder at this moment if killing spiders is really worth it. I would recommend a pregnancy test first...before any attack takes place. If you can't manage to get one, pick the spider up and kindly place it outside of your room. If its a jumping spider, i would recommend leaving the country altogether.

After all this happened I had two thoughts:
1. This reminds me of charlotte's Web the movie. At the end I remembered Charlotte died... and after the babies came out the spider in my room it died. It was like a history class that movie. Its like i knew just what had happened. That jumping spider carried all those babies on its back, while trying to save some pigs life in India. She came to my room to relax before dieing and giving birth. Then I came to ruin the story, and killed her, and attacked all her babies. Really not feeling bad about it for one minute. I mean seriously, this is India.
2. Ok, so I am looking forward to going home now. After encountering random weird insects....this was it. I officially decied, yes I am excited to come home. Where right now its winter, and spiders are frozen under the snow.

My poem for India

If a place feels like home
but home is far away
when you land on familiar ground
will home still feel the same?

When looking out and looking far
not knowing what is there
I close my eyes and start to see
its the Lord's heart i hear

I may not know if i fit well
or if i should never leave
If I pretend I had the choice to choose
would India fit well with me?

I think that maybe I fell in love
with a place that doesn't love me
a place doesn't have feelings
and it can not speak freely

If it could speak it maybe would say
" hello, and have a good day."
but really its left with nothing to speak
when the people speak for it anyway

So i really must say, its the people i love
and the place is empty and vain
without the faces, and colors to fill
I really wouldn't want to stay.

9 days...

Really can not believe my time is running out...

Today I was at the school, and just had the best time with all the students. They were trying to get me to say things in their language...which I am so bad at it. I always seem to laugh so hard, and pretend I am a student here. I am enjoying getting to know all of them, and their stories. I wish i wasn't leaving them so soon, but I believe God will bring me back to see them again somehow.

One student, gave me a present today and she just kissed me on the cheek when I went to hug her, and thank her. Two days ago I had shared with her that I loved her top, and she smelt so lovely. She showed up to school today with a brand new top ( that fit me perfectly) and her perfume. Her perfume happen to just be spray deodorant...so at first I thought that I maybe smelled of something. I asked her " Oh, so do I smell sometimes?" and she looked so confused, she said, " Oh, No I thought you liked my smell?". I was just so surprised that someone would do such a sweet thing. I really was so blessed by her.

There are so many things that I find to think about, while I have been here. Sometimes I feel like i think more then i speak. David has told me, that sometimes you can tell I stop listening in the middle of someone talking. I think I begin to think about the first things they shared, and forget that they are still speaking. When i go and sit somewhere my mind starts to think about all the things around me, and everything that is happening. I find it overwhelming, I guess. The way that everything is so different, and I can't put it all together. Its not like a puzzle in India, you can't make it all fit the way you like it to. You have to see that its differences is what make it fit.
If you were try to fit India inside of America, it wouldn't work. I think every place changes over time, people change as well. Life doesn't sit at a stand still, but sometimes it seems like it. Really if you watch carefully change happens every moment. So I continue to watch India change, and its astounding.

Power Out...Power In

The power went out in the house, so I thought while I have a full powered laptop still running, I should write a little.

For the last 2 hours there has been loud rave dance music playing outside, including base. One thing about India is that it doesn’t matter what you are doing, they are going to do their thing. Loud music is included in that. Seeing as it is almost 9 here at night, I am thinking it will have to end soon. I should record how ridiculous this music it actually. Two days after I leave India there is a huge festival, where for about a week straight they shoot off fireworks nonstop. All through the day and night. Our driver calls my living day “ Laura’s great escape”. I would have to say, I am looking forward to not being here while the noise is going off…if tonight is anything near that.

Before the power went out, I was loading “ a lot like love” on you tube to watch. Also while looking around my room, I decided I was going to organize a bit. I find myself a bit confused at times looking at all the random items in my room. I never know quite where they belong. I could put them somewhere but it still wouldn’t be the right spot.

Hooray! The power just came on…. my fan is going, and I will continue my upload of a lot like love, and my cleaning and organizing.

Oh, I think it is important to mention ( or a thanks to grandma Taylor ☺ ) I was using my handy dandy wind up flash light you gave me. I have used it, I don’t know how many times. ALSO some guys were working on our roof at night and needed a good flashlight…and they picked mine. So thanks grandma so much… you are blessing me way over here in India!

I may post more exciting news later.
Cheers big ears.

vace...fook?

Today I was talking with a friend here named Jino. He asked how he could keep in contact while I am traveling. I asked him " Have you heard of facebook?" and he said, " huh...vace fook?"
I just stopped for a moment and loved knowing someone had no idea what facebook was.
In India you can find people who have normal lives that don't include checking facebook daily.
I loved it. It made me want to get rid of mine, and just write letters the rest of my life...

Jino thanks for opening my eyes a little to the real world around me.
: )

New Faces in New places

Yesterday I got the opportunity to share a little of my story and teach at the school.
I loved it. It was my first time teaching with out an interpreter. I taught once in Austria, but we had an interpreter. I always get a little nervous 30 minutes before, but once i get started and stop thinking about myself I have a great time. I think i love looking at the students sometimes more then teaching, watching their faces and wondering what they are receiving as they are hearing all these teachers. I taught on " changing our view of God", In John 14 it talks about how Jesus is in the Father, and we are in Jesus. So when God looks at us He see's Jesus. So if we are seeing ourselves defeated, then we are seeing God wrong. God is not defeated, He is victorious...and He is on the inside of us. So I really enjoyed sharing the Truth.

Today we have the full time and part time students get together. Not only as it be a blast, but an opportunity to get to know each other. Of course when everyone began to arrive, it was a little quiet and I wasn't sure how to get each of the students to get to know each other. BUT then worship began and the students were worshiping and dancing, and just loving Jesus. Afterward they put on skits ( which were so hilarious ), and sang songs. Then we all had a tea break. We had each student stand up and share a little about themselves as well. Afterwards we played a game, and then had some lunch. The day continued with fun activities and just getting to know each other. I had the best time watching the students bonding so quickly. In some of the pictures I took, the guys were holding hands. In India men are more affectionate towards each other, like brotherly love. It is really is a heart felt thing, we would hug and just share how we care for each other, that is what they do.

By the end of the day, everyone was tired but happy. It was a success, and full of memories. I have talked with a handful of people and each of them tell me to come back and be a missionary in India : ) I secretly love that idea... I find some places to be so different, but you still feel so at home.

Greatest Day of Our Lives

I will begin with the lyrics from " Greatest Day" by Take That.

[Today this could be the greatest day of our lives
Before it all ends,
Before we run out of time
Stay close to me
Stay close to me
Watch the world come alive tonight
Stay close to me

Tonight this could be the greatest night of our lives
Let's make a new start
The future is ours to find
Can you see it?
Can you see it in my eyes?
Can you feel it now?
Can you hold it in your arms?

Tonight
Tonight
Oh stay close to me
Stay close to me
Watch the world come alive tonight
Stay close to me

Oh

Hold your head high
Hold your arms open wide
Let the worlds start come alive
When you stay close to me

Today this could be the greatest day of our lives
Today this could be the greatest day of our lives

Oh, and the world comes alive
And the world comes alive
And the world comes alive

Oh oh oh

Stay close to me
Stay close to me
Watch the world come alive tonight
Stay close to me... ]

Last Night I was singing to that song in my room, and realized that it is just what God has been saying to me. Stay close to me, and watch the world come alive, hold it in your arms. When I stay close to God, He shows me the world, and its so real. I really have been able to hold it in my arms. When I read these lines I loved them. "Hold your head high,Hold your arms open wide
Let the worlds start come alive,When you stay close to me". All these places I have been or are going to, I need to always get my head high, and just watch the world come alive. This may seem a bit strange...but really such a neat picture of what really does happen when I stay close to Him.

Thanks Take That ;)

Aw India

3 weeks left in India.

Some days I sit and think, I don't want to leave here. Other moments I think it will be so nice to be home. Indian people are hard to describe, but they love hard,at the same time they can hate hard. They seem to have strong personalities. So the people I have met, I have really fallen in love with. I can not imagine not seeing them ever again, or being so far from them. The students are the school are so wonderful, full of passion and soft hearts for learning. I love walking into the school in the mornings, and seeing two or three students that came in early, and welcome me with a big hello. There is a women named Sylvia who is older, and always greets me with one kiss on each cheek. I sat with her today and just chatted for a bit. She asked me when i was returning to India. That was a moment when i didn't want to imagine not ever see her again or for a long time. She was sitting there content, wrapped in a sauree and covered in grace. Her gray hair compliments for disposition. I feel like she is the wise old owl in the school, everyone loves her. A student today asked me " What are your hobbies". My first response was music, but really i felt like i used it as a crutch. I felt I needed to say something, but really my hobbies including doing random acts of kindess. ha I am a accidental traveler, who is always try to make it back home. ha I then asked him what his were, and he said " reading the word, and being with my Jesus." I loved that answer. I said, that was the perfect hobby to have. I love just seeing them, and watching how the talk and laugh. In the mornings the guys all gather in one room, and will sometimes just laugh the morning in, until worship starts. One morning i could hear singing, and I asked another lady students to tell me what they were singing. In Tamil, their language they were singing about David and the Lions den, and other bible characters. All of them dancing and singing...all about Jesus. I just can't help but smile all the time. I want to sit with each of them and just know their stories. I want to have dinner with them, and spend a day in their lives. I really have grown to love the way people are here. The men will even tell you things in America would be terriable, and I find it refreshing their honesty. A student went up to someone at school, and just said..." so you started loosing weight?". We all began to laugh and the other students didn't know why. They just say sometimes what is on their minds. India truly can bring a lot of joy. I think that more then India, its being right where God wants me that brings me the most joy of all. Its so fun to know that I am here and meeting people so far from my home!

So with 3 weeks left... I am going to try to soak up as much of India as I can.

Today the women who cleans our house here, told me she was going to a church birthday tonight. So she asked if she could change into her Saree in my room. She comes most days and afterwards goes home, but today she needed to go from here to the church.I told her, "Of course." She came and got ready for the evening as I watched every step. I was really hoping I could learn how to put a Saree on...no success. She brushed her hair out that is all the way to her thigh! She combs and combs. Then she puts her Saree on. Fabric after fabric wrapped around in such a way it looks stunning. Then she asked if I had face wash, and lotion. She said she likes my skin. lovely lovely.
After wards she braided her hair, and wanted to use my power. I try to explain I only had bronzer. We laughed as she showed me her powered that makes her skin lighter, and mine makes mine darker. That is the interesting part. They want to lighten their skin and we are trying to darken ours. She was all done and said, "Finished". I took a couple pictures so you could all see the finished product. It was a really fun experience!

Little joys

Instant temporary joys: Clean, warm sheets straight out of the dryer, and my brother’s banana pancakes, having my feet warm in winter, and a really nice cup of coffee.

There are things in life that bring joy or aka happiness to your daily lives. Things that we know make us happy. I truly believe God has placed little joys in our lives, cause he wanted to give us a taste of what BIG JOY is. The thing about little joys is: they only last so long. It is temporary. Example: my clean, warm sheets… of course they are only warm for about 2 minutes. So I wrap them around me as fast as I can to enjoy the few moments of after dryer goodness. As I laid in my bed this afternoon, I was thinking about the things that use to make me so happy. I found it so strange that being so far from all those things, I feel so happy all the time. I did have the thought, “It would be nice to have my shirts feel soft and smell fresh when I put them on.” Only I didn’t feel like I needed it to make me any happier. I then started thinking about what is making me so happy here in India.

I thought about why do we do things, or like things. Where do you find joy and happiness? Why doesn’t it last long? I think people cling to things that bring them little joys, but when it runs out they don’t have anything else to cling to. So they find thing after thing that replaces the ones that have run out. It reminded me of the story in the bible about Jesus giving living water that never runs out.
John 4:7
“ A Women of Samaria came to draw water, Jesus said to her, “ Give me a drink.” For His disciples had gone away into the city to buy food. Then the women of Samaria said to Him, “ How is it, that You being a Jew, ask a drink from me, a Samaritan woman?’ For the Jews have no dealings with the Samaritans. Jesus answered and said to her, “ If you knew the gift of God, and who it is who says to you, ‘Give me a drink,’ you would have asked Him, and He would have given you living water.” The women said to Him, “ Sir You have nothing to draw with, and the well is deep. Where then do you get that living water? Are you greater then our father Jacob, who gave us this well, and drank from it himself, as well as his sons and his livestock?” Jesus answered and said to her, “ Whoever drinks of this water will thirst again, but whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst. But the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life.”
Just like that water, there are things in life that are part of this world that bring temporary fulfillment. God came to bring us eternal fulfillment. He gave us a perfect picture of BIG joy. He was telling that woman that, yes you can drink this water, but I want you to know that I have something better for you. I am going to give myself for you, so that we can spend life together. By Jesus coming and giving Himself for us…He gave us a joy and life that is bigger and better then what we could come up with.

In all of this I found how me being in India, and being happy came together. Just like how it works for Jesus, He gave and in return got us. John 17:22 Jesus says, “ And the glory which you gave Me I have given them, that they may be one just as We are one; I in them, and You in Me; that they may be made perfect in one, and that the world may know that You have sent Me, and have loved them as you have loved Me.” And earlier He says (John 17: 13) “ But now I come to You, and these things I speak in the world, that they may have My joy fulfilled in themselves.”
Jesus found joy in what He was giving. He knew that what He was giving would bring joy to the world. John 16:22 “ Therefore you now have sorrow; but I will see you again and your heart will rejoice, and your joy no one will take from you.”

I truly believe I have been so happy here, because I know by giving I am bringing joy into someone else’s life everyday. So I found that I would rather have joy to give, then making my own for myself. In giving joy, it produces joy. I do still believe that it is good for the heart to enjoy the things the bring happiness. I still love warm sheets, and American breakfasts but I realize now that those are gifts from God, they are temporary and only He is forever.

So the little’s joys may not have much return, but the Big joy is an echo!

Come and meet my God

Finally posted on facebook a song I wrote here in India. If we are facebook friends you can check it out. They have a holiday here where the Hindu people throw their gods into the ocean. They make huge ones of all different kinds of material. So its a whole day of traffic through out the city, and ocean throwing. I remember being just shocked that people would be doing these things, and not know the real God, and you don't have to throw Him in the ocean. So I wrote a song talking about if they were to come and meet my God...and what it would be like. So hope you get a chance to hear it and enjoy.

Real India

Today was a pretty relaxed day. I spent the morning sleeping in, which is becoming a more usually event for me. When I first arrived here I was up around 7am ready for the day to begin. Down here in my new room I think it's a bit more dark in the mornings. So I woke up and headed to visit the students again, except today was part time. So the students only come once a week. I played some of my songs for them, and it seemed that they were really blessed by the words. I love playing and looking around at all their faces. I love seeing how people respond, and just they all look so Indian. I really loved it. I rode home after with a few other people out here helping in India. We stopped at a Indian food hotel a.k.a. restaurant. Here in India they called their restaurant hotels.
We ordered the usual, naun an Indian bread, and a load of different curry's and rice. They serve it on a platter with a big banana leaf! We were taught you only use your right hand for eating, cause the left hand is for taking care of business. ;)
So halfway through our meal my mouth was on fire, but I really am starting to enjoy it. They brought out the rice and I mixed up a bit of rice with curry and went in for the kill. Only to realize I swallowed a pepper! I found myself in compete silence trying to find a way to cool off my mouth. Drinking my water, drinking my lime juice, then more water, then these onions. Nothing was helping, and I still hadn't said anything, wanted to see if I could tough it. All of a sudden God sorted it out. They came out of no where with these Indian drinks. They are yogurt and sugar and I think some milk. It is to cool the stomach and mouth. MIRACLE. I think that maybe people almost die from spicy food..not really sure if that is quotable.
Once we got home all the power was out in the house, except for my room. So everyone piled in my room for a bit of hang time tell the "power man" showed up. All of us sat around chatting, and I played one of my songs. The power finally came on and everyone was about to leave, then a huge flying bug came right at me. I jumped up and yelled as I ran around literally in circles. Strange thing was it was following me...everyone just started cracking up. I found it all a bit crazy. They didn't know that I don't do well sometimes with that sort of thing. They quickly figured me out, and I leaped over the bed to escape. As we left my room, one of the guys said he thought he saw a bat flying around the house! Crazy Indian life. We all went to our rooms, and I talked a bit on skype, and then noticed a spider the size of texas run out from under my bed. Currently with my mom on skype, and freaked out. and went to grab a shoe and in the process realized the spider had disappeared.
No worries though, with my eagle eyes I spotted that bad boy quickly and destroyed it. It looked like a daddy long leg covered in hair. I was like...no more wild life. Just an update from my last post...I am currently staring at the lizard that was in my room last night. He is on my ceiling now... I don't know how he sticks up there...but he does...he is on his way out of my sight finally!
So another day in India...filled with India. Hope your day has a bit of Indian in it some how...keeps life adventurous!

unnamed lizards.

Snug in my bed, and spying on a little lizard I found hanging out on my wall. He is a small little thing, but I have already figured out his game. He follows which ever light is on...so I keep trying to put a light on further from where I am currently. The thing is the lizards don't want to bother me, but they still sorta do by accident. I wish I could have a wee chat with one of the little critters and let them know if they didn't come into my room, it would keep us both happy. They scurry when they see me, and I do the same. I want to name the lizards sometimes to make it seem more normal that they linger in my room. Then I think, don't name them cause then they will think that they have a home here...which for those lizards out there that think you do...you don't. no offense, but I just don't find reptiles a cozy addition to my room. I do have a friendly lizard in the bathroom I don't mind naming, but still having thought of one yet.