This little Light of mine.

This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine...This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine...
This is little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine...let it shine. let it shine, let it shine.

So today.
I was talking with my mom about how life ( the world) can sneak up out of no where and try to take you out. I have felt for the past few days a bit out of breath, and out of creativity. I find myself after watching films, or reading novels that I am sad they are not real. The thing is, deep down, I would love to be an actress. The idea of becoming some else for a short while is enchanting. Imaging in my mind, a life that is completely different then my own. So I pretended that watching celebs on The Ellen show, and joining twitter would bring me closer to "fame". A silly thing to try to accomplish, in the midst of living at the bottom of the world. It was more a pull towards the idea of people knowing me. Which after a chat with my mom, she pulled me out of my rut and back into reality.

See the world has these crazy things they find that are important. Then I believe it. It truly is so strange. Then again I did read today in the bible about this very thing. " For all that is in the world-the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life-is not of the Father, but of the world." -1 john 2:16 So pretty much that is: looking at yourself, comparing yourselves to others, then being prideful about it.There isn't anything wrong with fame, but it's what happens after the fame. Or before. If I try to strive to have all these things that I think would make me happy. or make me "feel" good, they wouldn't last long. I would love to act, but I want to know in my heart of hearts that it wouldn't ever be for the world, or fame. It would be because I knew that is what I was suppose to do. Gods plan.

My mom and I started talking about, some of the characters from the bible who became famous, not on purpose, but because their hearts were in the right place. David: killing a giant one day, taking care of sheep the next, the king noticed him after killing a giant, then David became king him self. Esther: an orphan, randomly chosen to be queen out of all the women in the land. She was just hanging out, doing what she thought she was suppose to be doing.

I guess I took a closer look at what fame should really look like. It should be a picture of a miracle, something that could not have ever happened without God's help. I want to fall into what God has planned for my life, not because I was forcing and fighting by myself to get there, but because God was placing me there as I continued steadly in what He wanted me to do first.

I kinda would get a bit down after watching all these actors and actress's talking and looking beautiful. Then I found this interview with Miley Cyrus. I have never been a "die hard" fan. Though what I do like about her, is how she doesn't try to be anyone but herself. A lady asked her " So what do you think of Twilight?", and without hesitation she said, " I don't believe in it, I don't like the idea of people falling in love with characters." I don't know if those were her exact words. But what I loved was hearing someone who was really well known, not being afraid to be different in their thinking. Its inspiring in a way, to see a little light among so much gray. Thanks Miley.

So Long post...short. I am learning that being who God created me to be, is more important then having the whole world know me by name. Instead the One who made the whole world, knows me by name. I am excited though to see where He takes me...so far, so good.